Very bleary-eyed, I stepped from rush-hour tube to smooth-landing plane and into calm but disorientating Vienna. It was when I collected my baggage that I realised that I wasn’t in London – that may seem quite a shameful delay but all of the past few days have been spent performing-choreographing-doing-latenightpacking that I had come to exist as a kind of “just keep going’ creature not really able to take in the city sights. So yes, it was with a jolt that I actually saw – as in actually saw – the German signs and appreciated that I had left London.  I have left London feeling incredibly full and this seems important to note. At present, I am at a place of being very content and rather than chasing anything or feeling pressure to race on/ahead, recent events and accomplishments have actually made my life feel very nourished – the generosity of everyone who donated to get me here is one such instance.  And so it is with a full self that I begin my DanceWEB adventure. I am under no illusion, however. This full self will have evaporated by the end of our first meeting this evening I am sure. And so it should. I can’t quite explain this full-but ready-to-be-pulled-apart again feeling and maybe I should be very, VERY careful what I wish for.  Perhaps I simply mean a teasing out from this full space into the unknown but feeling a solid platform underneath my feet nonetheless. Perhaps life’s occurrences often ultimately show that no matter how full you can feel (for me this is one of my very first, full feelings) there is no actual stopping or arriving for longer than is needed. I don’t know. I feel like I have needed this sense of arrival and want to hold onto it. Without being too fatalistic, life has other ideas and my full-self is telling me that I can handle it…and that the full feeling will be back soon.

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